On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.