I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Hey, remember that girl at rocklobster you thought was hot but were to pussy to talk to? You were right, her boobs are fake and she gives the best head on the planet. Can you come pick me up?
You're dead to me.
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...