Texts From Last Night · lauramae408's Favorites

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lauramae408's Favorites Texts:

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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.

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(937): View more from Ohio

talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

I hope making "real" money at your "real" job is worth it because you totally missed beer and dorrito mac n cheese tuesday.

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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(860): View more from Connecticut

She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.

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(503): View more from Oregon

gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.

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(562): View more from California

even your uterus rejects him.

(1-562): View more from California

apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.

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(704): View more from North Carolina

she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"

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