she went apple picking. why dont we do cute things like that? let's go to a pumpkin patch!
because we're not cute. we're sluts. and sluts don't go apple picking.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
I dont know to explain this.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.