just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
why did i make a hit list last night containing only McDonalds?
you tried to order a magarita mcflurry and when they said they didnt make those you tried to call 911
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I was just told by a cop that my party was the most epic party they ever crashed
so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong