Texts From Last Night

Texts from May, 2011

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  (678): View more from Georgia

  in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm

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  (678): in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm http://tfl.nu/30ts
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.

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  (256): I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body. http://tfl.nu/ulji
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP

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  (630): This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP http://tfl.nu/camw
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  (360): View more from Washington

  Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told...

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  (360): Had a drag queen carry me to the car. So I'm told... http://tfl.nu/tfwr
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend

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  (918): He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend http://tfl.nu/82q6
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz

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  (870): God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz http://tfl.nu/dral
  Replies (4) Good night (2125) Bad night (1009) Order T-Shirt
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.

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  (770): She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40. http://tfl.nu/qfdq
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.

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  (989): I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it. http://tfl.nu/prf6
  Replies (14) Good night (4827) Bad night (785) Order T-Shirt
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.

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  (918): I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka. http://tfl.nu/0tbw
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training

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  (519): I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training http://tfl.nu/kvls
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  (517): View more from Michigan

  at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.

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  (517): at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees. http://tfl.nu/qho2
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.

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  (314): She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good. http://tfl.nu/atnn
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  (646): View more from New York

  but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered

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  (646): but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered http://tfl.nu/sriz
  Replies (8) Good night (3351) Bad night (709)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar

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  (812): I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar http://tfl.nu/fo8u
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  (516): View more from New York

  This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me

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  (516): This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me http://tfl.nu/3xgn
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