Already got asked if we're dating
I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
I hope I don't blackout because this is awesome!
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Oh my God, I want him to live with his face in my vagina forever.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. She asked how my day was going and it got hard.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
