i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
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Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
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