Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I puked off the balcony.
Not horrible
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
If I get to the point of singing Man of Constant Sorrow then please god let me do it, record it, then cut me off.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Randomize
