Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
found out this morning via facebook that the guy i met last night has a wife and a baby and he took me to his apartment where he takes girls to cheat on his wife
i mean you met him at the daytona 500
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
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