I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
i just sexted for my mom while she was driving, i have hit an all time low.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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