How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
Randomize
