Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
I think the pivotal moment was when we used the see and say as a drinking game with shots of whiskey. It was all downhill after that.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
