she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
either way he was missing a nipple.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
My roommate just yelled at me for coughing. I'd like to yell at her for doing lines off our counter last night.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
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