haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
terrible decisions. terrible terrible terrible decisions.
who'd you have sex with.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
NoShamevember. You game?
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
I lost the right to judge tonight
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
this isn't the first time i woke up with peanut butter in my butt
Randomize
