HIV tests are more positive than that guy
VITAMINS IN VODKA. IM NOT LYING.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Are you wearing clothes?
Fuck no, who do you think I am
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize