I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize