I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
In all the years we have had drunk sex, have we ever done it in a bed?
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
