gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Walk of shame... his parents made me go to church with them first. in my club top sweat pants and slippers. i just slapped god in the face
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Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
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Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
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