i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
23 Bisexuals Confess The Biggest Differences Between Dating People Of Each Sex
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
These 25 Ruthless Teachers Embarrassed Their Students
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Damn victory sex feels great