are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
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sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
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True life. I have to get a nose job due to a deviated septum from blowing coke. Thank you college.
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
How did "late lunch" turn into 8 solid hours of drinking??? I feel like death.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs