I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
Dude I'm so glad we're not friends anymore. It would have made fucking your stepmom last night really awkward. Dickwad.
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
I just saw a cat, if i ate those mushrooms 15 minutes earlier i wouldn't have made it to the bar
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize
