He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
Never get a handjob from a girl who gives deep tissue massages.
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
I have just two goals for this NYE. 1) get so drunk that every guy looks like Clive Owen 2) make out with as many Clive's as possible.
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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