whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
Hungover snowboarding. Puked off the lift and traumatized a group lesson for kids. Crash course on adulthood.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
All I did was call him a fucker when he took my pot. He didn't have to arrest me.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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