I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Well you busted in the house and yelled with pride about Uber giving you a ride over with your new bong.
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
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