how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
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