i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
There's just this way he looks at me that makes me want to suck his soul out through his dick.
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I was handcuffed to a girl for half-an-hour. And I'm still the only one in the house who didn't get laid.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
cinco de mayo stole my toenail
cinco de mayo stole my virginity.
Randomize
