I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
Randomize
