i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
I'm at work. It's margarita night. Someone literally just shouted "MURICUH!"
God bless us, everyone.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize