Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
your all-time low pick up line was when you asked a girl "Are you rock-staring at me?"
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
Yes I went home with her last night. I woke up this morning and ran into my boss on the way to the bathroom. Monday is going to suck at work.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
