i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I like how the only thing you spelled correctly is "i'm tequila"
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
its 2pm and were already starting beer pong...its gonna be a good night
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
