I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
no... you woke up naked next to the toilet because you said your outfit was too cute to throw up in
my brother is about to go smoke a joint outside... he's preparing his munchies on the counter beforehand. I admire his responsibility.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I can't remember much about walking home last night. I think I kicked a dog.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
What a dumb baby whore.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
