I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Feels like someone put a cigar out where my butthole used to live
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize