She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
we're so committed to being not committed
Quit bitching. I brought you a muffin.
Randomize
