As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
In the middle of blowing him I looked at him and said "Your so old..." and then continued. I need to stop drinking.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
