none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
The tent neighbors already set us on fire w an errant roach. How do you think Bonnaroo's going?!
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I have a better chance beating China's military with slap bracelets than this plan has of working.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
Are you ok? Who pooped in my office?
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Randomize
