Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
White coat. Heels.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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