I changed my tire completely alone.. I could totally win survivor
Its my greatest physical accomplishment
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Going to the bathroom drunk while wearing overalls is such a struggle
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
We hooked up last night. I think it was great for our friendship.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
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