margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
On my way home i need to take a massive dump and couldn't wait.
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
Is it penis luge time yet?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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