so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
