I look better un-naked...
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
my morning attempts to try to have sex with him was interrupted by the passion of the christ parade going on outside my house
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
The expiration date on my 40 is the same day as my 21st birthday
Randomize
