I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
My mom just walked in on me naked taking a shit and packing a bowl...the only comment she makes is, she wants her Tupperware back after my pot's out of it. Best mom ever.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Do you remember the guy that smelled like hot dogs?
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
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