gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
they just did a mariachi cover of free bird
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
We have started to decorate penises.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Randomize
