i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Randomize
