Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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