haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
hey remember that time we got really drunk, you tried to find narnia in my refrigerator and passed out in the freezer drawer??
no.
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
Fucked him in a graveyard. Need plan b.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
