I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
She started doing push ups and calling me a pussy. Never set me up with your ROTC friends again.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
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