i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
It took like and hour to get him in me and then he came in like 2min. Size aint everything
Randomize
