Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Anthony wouldn't know good sex if it sat on his face
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Ok well i was gonna say you can only borrow my fog machine if you will use it to emerge from your room in a cloud of smoke after having sex with sarah, so yeah we're good
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Its really awkward pooping while on videochat. Even if you turn the video off.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
