is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
I just want to do a slip-and-slide into a giant pool of jello shots right now.
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
Randomize
