i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Please, take the 2 shots of vodka that I left as an apologie.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
We have so much sex to catch up on
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
