He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
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And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
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In the last 3 weeks my drunken adventures have caused me to lose 2 credit cards, one debit card, a bracelet, two purses, and my $500 phone... Maybe i should quit drinking.
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Like my mom really needs to know just how non existent my sex life is
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
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