I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
Randomize
